No, I did not foresee my maternity leave being like this. I planned on having my friends and family being able to see and hold my new baby. I planned on visiting my family and friends in Philly who I only see a few times a year. I planned on getting back into working out at the YMCA. I did not plan on spending an extra day in the hospital in fear that me or my family would contract a (for some) life threatening virus. I didn’t plan on not being able to go to the store and find items to protect or use for myself or my family such as toilet paper, paper towels, even diapers, hand sanitizer, lysol ect (stuff that I would normally use having a newborn home and a toddler who was supposed to be in school). I didn’t plan to fear for my own, my kiddies, or my husband’s well being every time I saw someone cough or sneeze; or seriously feel the need to spray my husband with every household disinfectant available every time he had to pick up my prescription or buy us groceries… I definitely didn’t plan to stay in the house……… indefinitely.
During this time I felt really compelled to share some good news. In the midst of all of this craziness, the spirit or fear is lurking ready to attack our minds and our speech and our behaviors. Let me remind all of us who believe and tell some who don’t, that God did not give us a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7). That spirit that tells me to think worst case scenarios that will likely not happen, or keep quiet about who God is and has been to me because He may not come through…. that is not of God! And that is certainly not what He would commission me to do. Phil 4:6-7 tells us to “be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
I pray that God show His miraculous healing power and it be manifested all over the world. That miracles take place in the hospital rooms and in the homes of people infected with the virus. Im praying for comfort, peace, and reassurance for the family members who have lost loved ones, or are experiencing life with a sick someone. I pray a supernatural healing takes place all over the world not just from the virus but from anxiety and fear and emotional stress. I pray for protection for everyone who needs to be exposed to the sick (known or unknown) and return to their families every night/day. I pray that the spirit of fear be removed from especially us who call ourselves christian, and that we can stand in faith for those who are faithless at this time. That we can be the mouthpiece for the good news, that we can walk in the power and authority of the Holy Spirit to fight the enemy who has come to steal, kill, and destroy. We are His children, and He is our God. A healer, a restorer, a miracle worker, a deliverer. There is nothing too hard for Him. Nothing that can take Him by surprise. And He cares about the things concerning us. I thank God that His will be done and for the testimonies that will be shared in the days to come.
Had things not happened this way, I would not have had my husband home with me to help with this not so smooth recovery. And our marriage and family needed this time together. When things are like this it’s hard to understand why everything is happening the way that it is, but I always find comfort in my bible.
“In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comfort delights my soul.” -Psalms 94:19